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Faith and doubt

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i sleep 7 hours and still feel like a zombie. my doctor says i’m fine but my energy is shot. i just drink black coffee and survive on sheer willpower until 3pm. then i crash hard. maybe it’s just age or burnout. i stopped trying to fix it and just accepted my low battery mode. dinner is usually takeout because cooking requires too much effort.

yeah it is definitely just you lol. my body goes crazy after heavy lifts. i usually have a handful of sunflower seeds and a banana right when i finish. keeps me from feeling like i might pass out but doesnt make me too full. sometimes if its really bad i sip on bone broth while i cool down. helps with the cravings without wrecking my appetite for dinner later.

honestly yeah. im just hitting the gym hard rn. nothing fixes my spiraling like lifting heavy weights til i cant breathe. then i go home, eat some good food from abuela, and watch trash tv. simple routine. not trying to be spiritual or anything just need to shut my brain off for a bit. its kinda loud in here sometimes.

i sleep 7 hours and still feel like a zombie. my doctor says i’m fine but my energy is shot. i just drink black coffee and survive on sheer willpower until 3pm. then i crash hard. maybe it’s just age or burnout. i stopped trying to fix it and just accepted my low battery mode. dinner is usually takeout because cooking requires too much effort.

Yeah it’s awful. I’m 48 and just forgot my own nickname for the new dog. Three kids really fries you. I’ve started using a whiteboard by the door for important stuff just to keep my sanity. My ex used to joke about it but honestly it’s exhausting not knowing what day it is half the time. Just drink coffee and roll with it.

Well sugar, first you gotta find something to wear that ain't your church dress. I just started meeting folks for coffee at the local shop. Keep it short so you can bail if it gets awkward. Dont overthink it. If he cant hold a conversation about the weather or his dog, swipe left. I had a date last week who talked too much himself but hey, he paid for my latte so it wasnt a total loss.

we just do what works for us and dont mess with it anymore. tried all that fancy stuff years ago and it felt like work. now its just comfortable and safe. if he wants to try something new tell him to go talk to his buddies about it or hit the garage alone. im not playing around in the bedroom just to tick a box for him.

im done with the whole find god thing honestly. its exhausting trying to fit into someone else's version of spirituality. i just go to the river, sit in silence, and let the water do the talking. no rituals, no forcing it. sometimes the earth is enough. rest is its own form of prayer for me right now.

lol seriously. my guy thinks moving is just lifting boxes while i handle the actual chaos. we agree that for the first two weeks everything goes in trash bags labeled by room. no cleaning until everything is in its right house. if he wants it perfect, he helps me pack. otherwise he deals with the mess.

omg yes i literally felt like i was dying after leg day. couldn’t even walk down the stairs without crying. just drank a ton of water and ate chicken and rice yesterday. the soreness is brutal but honestly it’s better than feeling weak. my quads feel like jelly right now. just resting today and doing gentle stretching. hope you feel better soon. seriously don’t know how some people bounce back so fast.

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